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Saturday, September 22, 2012

A Satur Day

"Oh my heck! When I want to kiss her I will!"  (a note I found in a pile today which I took from a kid last week )

Putting my finger on the pulse of just one day in my mortality...Today I
--read 14 pages from the Book of Mormon
--finished knitting the toe on grandson Pete's Christmas stocking
--fetched my Bountiful Basket
--shopped for groceries
--fed the "boys" their daily hay
--kavetsched with "Off-the-grid Bill" in the alpaca field about latter-day prophecies (watch out for the year without rain that's coming up!), hay, provident living and government grants
--washed dishes
--put away the ice cream freezer and raclette grill after locating ALL the multiple parts
--cleaned out under the sink
--herded the "girls" off the road not one, not two, not three or ever four but FIVE times!!!!!  They have become free-ranging "lawn ornaments" due to the lack of water and subsequent lack of food in their pasture
--put up an alpaca barracade of sorts using a wooden pallet, a septic tank cover, and a garden hose
--washed 5 front windows inside and out
--cut down perrenials in front
--washed bird poop off of the porch
--cleaned the remains of a dead mouse out of a drawer
--soaked a pot in which I burned apples I was cooking last week.  I'm afraid it's a goner.
--made a crockpot of white bean and hamhock soup
--did wash
--watched two episodes on Amazon Prime Instant View of Friday Night Lights to which I am strangely attached (Texas high school football??????  Really, Mad...)
--called an aunt and a cousin
--fed my sourdough start
--washed off some shelves
--cleaned out my lazy Susan in the kitchen
--soaked up some gorgeous September sun with Mugsy
And now I'm taking a bowl of strawberries up to my bed where my day will end knitting and watching TV.

Friday, September 14, 2012

Eschatology and Elixirs

Eschatology i/ˌɛskəˈtɒlədʒi/ (from the Greek ἔσχατος/ἐσχάτη/ἔσχατον, eschatos/eschatē/eschaton meaning "last" and -logy meaning "the study of", first used in English around 1550)[1] is a part of theology, philosophy, and futurology concerned with what are believed to be the final events of history, the ultimate destiny of humanity—commonly referred to as the "end of the world" or "end time".

The Oxford English Dictionary defines eschatology as "The department of theological science concerned with ‘the four last things: death, judgement, heaven, and hell’."[2]

In the context of mysticism, the phrase refers metaphorically to the end of ordinary reality and reunion with the Divine..

I've never actually known what eschatology definitively meant.  Paco has responded "Eschatology" on many many occasions when I've  asked him what he will be speaking about in church.  I always assumed (using my best context clue skills) that he meant "mysteries."  So when I encountered a deep deep mystery, I immediately responded mentally with, "Ahhhhhhhh....eschatology..."   Two weeks ago I took a crockpot of pulled pork to a family picnic in Utah.  I left the leftovers with my kids and brought the pot home dirty because it looked like it might need some elbow grease to get it clean  The fact that that crockpot ended up in the back of my car trunk for 4 or 5 days and then was left on the garage floor for ahem...another 9 a topic for discussion at another time when I open myself up for "deep dark faults that we hide."  Get on to the mystery, Mad!  You're losing them!  YESTERDAY you can imagine my utter shock and incredulity when I found that crockpot--glass lid lying neatly beside it--resting in our side field out by the bonfire pit!!!!!!  Closer inspection revealed that the pot was in perfect condition and had been meticulously licked clean both inside and out!!!  And that's my story!  I immediately suspected Snoopy, the neighbor's beagle.  But HOW????????  He would have had to have drug it over a cement garage floor, through the garden boots, over the door frame, down a step and about 50 feet over rocks!!!!    Paco suspects it to be the work of a raccoon, whom he insists are very very clever.  It's the whole opposable thumb thing that has me stumped.  I'm thinking an opposable thumb would be critical to the operation.  What do you think?????  Sounds like the "end of ordinary reality" to me...

 And THIS is my elixir!!!  No, I didn't melt chocolate chips!  I cleaned out my fridge and fired up the Champion juicer.  To say that this juice is fit for the Gods is a gross gross understatement.  It defies description.  Delectable.  Magnificent.  The vegetables I remember juicing were tomatoes, spinach, zucchini, and kale (about the only thing my garden yielded this year), but I can neither confirm nor deny that there may be other ingredients.  I got carried away.  I added some salt and downed a heaping glass of this.  I resisted the overwhelming urge to drop everything and write sonnets, symphonies, and Pulitzer fiction!!  I think I'll go to bed comtemplating how I'm going to use the extra decade of life I'm sure I added to my mortality today...

Saturday, September 8, 2012

An Open Letter to the Animal Kingdom

Please be forewarned that any and all animal life entering the residence of Paco and the Mad Hadder who have NOT been domesticated, named and given a bowl of food and water by said Paco and Mad Hadder will be dispatched immediately.  This includes (but is not limited) to those of you who crawl, fly, leap, slither, or dart.  As for the squirrel who sprinted in last night and is now sequestered in the cellar, you have been warned!  One tiny tooth inserted into our food storage down there will necessitate immediate declaration of WAR!  Touch just one potato and your fate will be sealed.  Heretofore mice have been semi-tolerated.  The residents have placed posion and then semi-good humor-edly disposed of the remains.  The rodent who DIED in the washing machine bin recently has necessitated institution of a zero tolerance policy.  ALL FOREIGN INTRUDERS BE THEY BAT, MOUSE, SQUIRREL, COYOTE, BIRD, FLY, OR WILDEBEAST WILL BE MERCILESSLY BROOMED WITHOUT FURTHER ADO.     ...The Management

Friday, September 7, 2012

7 Random Happiness Moments

My newest granddaughter, Maren, weezling her way into her father's heart
My friend, Melonie, posing with a gnome  named Gnerdy I knit for her
My oldest grandchild, Lily, at her field day in Centennial, CO

Grandsons, Pete and Charlie, keeping cool

Happy houseplants on my old-fashioned grandma porch
My English garden dainty ladies

Charlie and Pete enjoying mud

Thursday, September 6, 2012

I've Never Seen the Likes...

I SOOOOOOOOOO didn't have seminary teachers the likes of THESE!  But then I guess I can't account for what they did "over there" after the last bell rang...

Cyber Sweet Nothings

4/6/97  7:36 P.M.

Hi Jerry,
I noticed you on the Singles listing.  Are you still in Beijing?  I'm going to be in Osaka and Singapore this summer.
Your job sounds interesting.  I teach English in a high school.  I read more than I should, ski slowly not to miss the sights, tamper with dog breeding, and raise 3 kids.  My married life included 13 very interesting but tempestuous years with a very "artistic" concert pianist.  We did some exotic things, and unfortunately his mental health took some exotic turns also.  I''m 5'10", black hair, 145 lbs. 43 years old.  I used to be way more funny.  But every now and again I kick it in and make people laugh.  I'm very converted to the gospel.
Always looking for friends and interesting men on the internet.  I'm a pretty loyal corresponder. Write if you're interested.

4/7/97 12:42 P.M.

You're among a short list of women who saw my profile on the web and sent me a message.  I'm still in Beijing and will be for another couple of months.  Then it will be back to the states, possibly via Melbourne, Perth, Manila and Hong Kong.  My job is quite interesting, and at the moment quite time-consuming.
I don't tamper with animals--with my work schedule, that's what it would be if I tried to maintain pets.  Back in the U.S. I have a couple of cocker spaniels on my refrigerator.
Unfortunately, both of my children died shortly after they were born.  Thus, for the moment I'm missing out on the joys and sorrows of parenthood.
I'm 45, 6'1", 175 pounds, brown hair and eyes, with tortoise shell glasses.  (Does that really matter on the Internet?)
Your name sounds like something from within the British Empire, but the .us at the of your e-mail address tells me that you're probably located in the U.S.  You have an advantage, knowing where I'm located.  Where are you located?
What happened to your sense of humor?  You'd have trouble convincing me that after 13 tempestuous years married to a concert pianist whose mental health turned like a Formula 1 racecourse, you've lost must have been quite an adventure.
I'm quite converted to the Gospel as well.  That's why I particularly like the Beijing Branch.  Both the Branch members and the spirit are quite strong here, and I'm fortunate to be exposed to them.
'What will take you to Osaka and Singapore?  I have people trying to persuade me to move to Singapore for a year.
What would you like to know?

Thus began an innocent correspondence.  Do not fear that I am going to post all 13 bound volumes of letters we exchanged over a 14 month period of time while Paco was in China and I was in Idaho.  I merely posted these first two verbatim so that the gentle reader can catch the nuances of two single strangers meeting in cyberspace--separated by thousands of miles of continents and oceans...

Monday, September 3, 2012

Self Loathing or Blame It On Brothers and Sisters!

Head hanging.  Idle toe poking in the dirt.  Looking up for even the hint of compassion in the eyes of any readers who haven't vacated the premises and moved on to a blogger who actually...blogs.  The truth is that NO one has missed this blog more than I.  Writing it is certainly in my top 10 favorite things to do.  If it's any consolation--I've written dozens of post in my head!!  And thought of toting around a small notebook to write down my ideas.  But never fear!  In an effort to NOT go quietly into 60, I have committed to writing 60 blogposts (in addition to some other things I'm going to do 60 of) before I turn 60 in April!!! 
Part of the blame for my slack certainly goes to a TV series I adopted hook, line, and sinker!!  I picked up the first 3 seasons in a thrift shop in Jackson last summer.  Oh my everloving goodness.  And then it wasn't bad enough that I gave MYSELF over to it--I hooked my daughter as well.  We obsessed.  Not since Gilmore Girls have we done that!!!!  Shelly even admitted to including the Walkers subconsciously in her prayers!!  That's bad.  I finished today, and I just want to part with a little shoutout to all my "peeps":  I've loved you all.  Kevin and Scotty, I applaud your courage and wish I were your neighbor so we could raise those babies together!!!!  Kitty, REALLY??????  Sarah and Luke, you make me believe in romantic love.  Nora, my goodness.  You are an iron woman and deserve some deep lie-free love.  Justin, I think you were my favorite.  Saul, who knew you could sing??????  Rebecca?????  Holly????????  Nurse girlfriend???????  Tommy, you slunk off.  Why?  Robert, we need you this November!!! Sarah's newfound sister introduced in the ladies' room at the wedding?  I feel so CHEATED to not get YOUR story.  And Brody...badaboom, you old cuss. 
My friends Jeff and Mary took pity on me today after I laid the whole confessional on them and gave me 3 seasons of Friday Night Lights.  We'll see.
Blessed an angel, Maren Emerson Giles, on Sunday in Orem.  And last but not least...A Definitive List of What I Brought Home In My Subaru From Utah Today:  25 pounds of organic carrots, 3 packages of spinach, 5 pounds of oranges, 1/2 bushel of apples, 1/2 bushel of tomatoes, 1 cantalope, 3 bottles of green drink, 2 red peppers, 2 bunches of parsley, 3 bunches of grapes, 1 head of celery, 1 case of V-8, 10 pounds of new potatoes, 3 avocadoes, 2 heads of lettuce, 3 jalapeno peppers, and if you guessed I'm starting a juice fast give yourself a star.  Stay tuned.

Favorite books

  • Me 'n Steve
  • Thundering Sneakers
  • James Herriott's vet books
  • The Count of Monte Cristo
  • Travels with Charley
  • A Walk in the Woods
  • Peace Like a River
  • The Egg and I
  • Mary Poppins
  • Extremly Loud Incredibly Close
  • How Green Was my Valley